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The New Republic

(on which we stand)
by Kevin T. McEneaney
Sun Feb 12th, 2017

On Valentine’s Day we kidnap,

cuff illegal bad daddies

(whose wives are on food stamps)

who work assembly line nightshifts,

and take them away from

wives, sons, and daughters.


On Valentine’s Day

we give each other

sentimental love cards

printed in Mexico

where all the rapists live.


On Valentine’s Day we give

each other chocolate squares

and laugh at peasant farmers

who labor to produce

our special treats.


On Valentine’s Day we give

each other gorgeous cut flowers

grown in fertile Ecuador

where banana and potato

criminals unfairly

have three crops a year.


On Valentine’s Day we put

an extra half-spoon of Brazilian sugar

into our Columbian coffee

as we spit out complaints

on how our country is exploited

by dishwashers, waiters, fast-food workers,

and undocumented constructed workers

who do jobs deemed too dangerous for Americans.


Valentine’s Day

is a great historic holiday

where Christian love

is celebrated unconditionally.